Revelations

Indus Gendi now has new members on board, with Lenny leaving for Australia, and James and Mel leaving the band for their own personal reasons. On bass is Juan, on guitar is Amran, and on keyboards is Melodie. The sound is so much more different now simply because 3 of the instrumentalists are different, with different characters and different influences. This bit of change really fascinates me because it is just like creating a new creature!

Just like how if you mix Hydrogen with Oxygen, you will get one thing, and if you mix Carbon with Oxygen, you will get another thing. It’s the same here! Playing with Lenny, James, and Mel created a certain sound, but playing with Juan, Amran, and Melodie is creating an entirely different sound! And with the new dynamics and feel, naturally we, the old members, will go along with the flow and play in a way that would fit everyone else’s style.

This really makes me excited. Perhaps as a musician, things like that really hype me up. I feel excited just thinking of the new possibilities for the band and the unexpected paths we might get to go on. I feel inspired to write new material and better myself so that I can match up to everyone else. I feel motivated to look for more and more gigs as our band evolves and grows. But one thing I really wish for the band is for Lenny to return real soon.

On a side note, I swear I have the cutest tuition student in the world. She just messaged me, telling me that she got selected to represent her school in the national spelling bee contest. I asked her when it is going to be, and she replied, “Saturday. I gotta wake up early. Tartarsauce!” Gosh the cuteness!! Which 10 year old would curse about waking up early by exclaiming “Tartarsauce”???? I do not deny that I completely favour her over all my other students.

It’s not only because she is so cute, which causes me to favour her. She is also very intelligent, pays attention during the lesson, and interacts and befriends me. She asks me questions when she stumbles upon questions which are more difficult, and does not pretend to understand what I’m saying if she doesn’t. She is almost a tutor’s dream come true.

Suddenly I feel that certain lecturers and instructors can’t really be blamed for favouring one student over another. We often bitch about such teachers who show obvious favouritism and how we are probably graded unfairly. But are they the only ones at fault? It’s after all only human tendency for one to favour something/someone which appeals to them, be it due to a good appearance, or a positive disposition. So can we really blame teachers who dislike us if we choose to be difficult and unlovable students? No, not entirely.

I’m sure there are a couple of ace teachers out there who are able to overlook every student’s imperfections and judge everyone fairly, but I guess those kind of teachers are like needles in haystacks, a miracles bestowed upon lucky students who get them.

Doodlejump

Recently, I have been very obsessed with an Iphone game called Doodlejump. It is by far one of the most addictive handphone games I have ever played in my life. Basically, it is all about a Doodle creature which hops from platform to platform and avoids obstacles which might cause its dear little life to terminate. Missing a platform means it dies too. So the higher it goes, the higher your high score is!

I have been hard at work trying to beat my good friend Felicia's high score of 27640, and I must say I just succeeded in doing so, at the grand high score of 28221!!!! Once upon a time, I never imagined that I could even reach a mere 20000, and was grateful to just go above 10000. But while my scores gradually increased as I improved in the game, I could not help but feel discontented with what I had and felt a strong need to top myself.

The bottomline is, is this my attitude towards other things in life too? If not, should it be?

I am not exactly doing superbly well in school, scraping by with Bs and a miraculous A- here and there. Sometimes I wish I had the motivation to study harder and get better grades just like how I play Doodlejump so hard. My parents are paying so much for my education, yet I am such a weakling, unable to even get out of bed in the morning to attend class.

One thing for sure is that I want to apply this Doodlejump attitude towards music. Currently, I am not. I am awfully lazy. I am lazy to practise my pathetic keyboard skills, lazy to practise my mediocre singing, and yet I want to sing in a band. I know that my greatest love in life is music. Then why am I wasting my skills and talents away by indulging in the horrendous sin of sloth?? Typing this down disgusts myself as I am exposing myself to myself.

Just like most other people, I live from day to day, unaware of the core of me, the core of my potential, and the core of my behaviour. I act like Doodlejump is the most important thing in the world when it is not. I neglect the things that are of utmost importance to me, such as my music, my studies, and my family. What is wrong with you Esther Low?? Get your life back together!

I need to get my life back together before it is not even there.